did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
