Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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