What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
We don't watch enough power rangers
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
