O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
i drank out of a bidet.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Randomize
