everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
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