Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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