So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
