All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Randomize
