After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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