I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
