Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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