At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
