drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize