I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
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