What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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