I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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