you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
