We're facebook friends in real life
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
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