Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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