I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize