doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize