remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize