new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
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