He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
