how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
