So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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