Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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