so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
