when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
