we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize