Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
i believe in u and ur pee
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
