Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
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