so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
