I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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