Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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