Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats. http://tfl.nu/sl2y
  Replies (15) Good night (743) Bad night (4081)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me. http://tfl.nu/gxz0
  Replies (14) Good night (5348) Bad night (719)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from England

  if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed

  (+44): View more from England

  keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed (+44): keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction http://tfl.nu/lbnu
  Replies (18) Good night (4671) Bad night (642)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  my phone cant type all the emotion im having

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): my phone cant type all the emotion im having http://tfl.nu/rfn6
  Replies (6) Good night (1053) Bad night (3661)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized. http://tfl.nu/cbfh
  Replies (11) Good night (5059) Bad night (966)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.

  (1-802): View more from Vermont

  it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont. (1-802): it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup. http://tfl.nu/03vx
  Replies (11) Good night (3949) Bad night (917)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl http://tfl.nu/bt6t
  Replies (1) Good night (1379) Bad night (2267)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (205): That's why they call him "the cheesegrater". http://tfl.nu/ctav
  Replies (6) Good night (864) Bad night (3689)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple. http://tfl.nu/c07n
  Replies (12) Good night (2203) Bad night (804)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup http://tfl.nu/4mdx
  Replies (6) Good night (1092) Bad night (577)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch. http://tfl.nu/ra61
  Replies (5) Good night (414) Bad night (740)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo http://tfl.nu/r2ud
  Replies (4) Good night (805) Bad night (451)
• Favorite

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (985): Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine. http://tfl.nu/rmj5
  Replies (2) Good night (833) Bad night (276)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (323): Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis http://tfl.nu/u0al
  Replies (3) Good night (487) Bad night (231)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (647): I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back http://tfl.nu/xuo9
  Replies (1) Good night (282) Bad night (440)

Randomize