We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
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From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
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don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together