i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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