In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Randomize
