Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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