If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
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