Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize