Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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