butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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