They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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