IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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