he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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