Texts From Last Night

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  (646): View more from New York

  If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?

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  (646): If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways? http://tfl.nu/v2q3
  Replies (2) Good night (1385) Bad night (864)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!

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  (610): Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me! http://tfl.nu/2u3z
  Replies (15) Good night (4737) Bad night (954)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.

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  (812): And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me. http://tfl.nu/o9ei
  Replies (13) Good night (4054) Bad night (1319)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment

  (757): View more from Virginia

  Personally I think it's a tremendous investment

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  (215): I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment (757): Personally I think it's a tremendous investment http://tfl.nu/ikjn
  Replies (8) Good night (2804) Bad night (763)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.

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  (757): I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it. http://tfl.nu/htjg
  Replies (10) Good night (3105) Bad night (1252)
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  (619): View more from California

  i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die

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  (619): i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die http://tfl.nu/4ks9
  Replies (18) Good night (1215) Bad night (4890)
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.

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  (434): i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister. http://tfl.nu/d8xo
  Replies (34) Good night (3568) Bad night (3110)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?

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  (352): Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours? http://tfl.nu/ajza
  Replies (12) Good night (2420) Bad night (738)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"

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  (865): He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore" http://tfl.nu/phr6
  Replies (2) Good night (542) Bad night (378)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring

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  (201): hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring http://tfl.nu/45rz
  Replies (3) Good night (521) Bad night (347)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.

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  (250): Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me. http://tfl.nu/kle9
  Replies (3) Good night (436) Bad night (775)
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  (729): View more from

  Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.

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  (729): Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete. http://tfl.nu/1y7k
  Replies (12) Good night (1515) Bad night (361)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.

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  (907): Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood. http://tfl.nu/d01c
  Replies (3) Good night (609) Bad night (221)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...

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  (603): I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff... http://tfl.nu/2u8y
  Replies (2) Good night (221) Bad night (428)
• Favorite

  (951): View more from California

  I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him

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  (951): I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him http://tfl.nu/3cah
  Replies (3) Good night (298) Bad night (558)

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