Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(604): View more from British Columbia

I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(604): I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks. http://tfl.nu/kxma

Replies (34) Good night (2232) Bad night (2641)
Favorite
(703): View more from Virginia

Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(703): Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor http://tfl.nu/qca9

Replies (20) Good night (2614) Bad night (541)
Favorite
(818): View more from California

I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(818): I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff http://tfl.nu/b3xl

Replies (83) Good night (12071) Bad night (1267)
Favorite
(617): View more from Massachusetts

This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(617): This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off? http://tfl.nu/xunp

Replies (10) Good night (637) Bad night (2669)
Favorite
(714): View more from California

I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(714): I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness. http://tfl.nu/2r5a

Replies (20) Good night (3945) Bad night (830)
Favorite
(765): View more from Indiana

we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(765): we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright. http://tfl.nu/328h

Replies (17) Good night (7243) Bad night (1029)
Favorite
(216): View more from Ohio

We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(216): We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber http://tfl.nu/uas6

Replies (16) Good night (3851) Bad night (993)
Favorite
(412): View more from Pennsylvania

He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(412): He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip http://tfl.nu/r0us

Replies (36) Good night (2266) Bad night (6783)
Favorite
(778): View more from British Columbia

we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(778): we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go" http://tfl.nu/uvr2

Replies (3) Good night (3233) Bad night (776)
Favorite
(540): View more from Virginia

we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here

(540): View more from Virginia

you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(540): we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here (540): you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill http://tfl.nu/12nq

Replies (8) Good night (3134) Bad night (675)
Favorite
(732): View more from New Jersey

WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(732): WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"? http://tfl.nu/186c

Replies (4) Good night (1558) Bad night (595)
Favorite
(940): View more from Texas

Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(940): Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito? http://tfl.nu/3rt4

Replies (11) Good night (2300) Bad night (504)
Favorite
(678): View more from Georgia

He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(678): He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!! http://tfl.nu/91da

Replies (8) Good night (1718) Bad night (294)
Favorite
(323): View more from California

You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(323): You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five http://tfl.nu/6fgb

Replies (3) Good night (654) Bad night (359)
Favorite
(647): View more from Ontario

I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(647): I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes. http://tfl.nu/g99k

Replies (4) Good night (239) Bad night (700)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: