perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
