Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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