But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize