So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Just invented taco cereal.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
